as i was thinking of reviving my personal blog space last few days, wait. not really that personal actually, omg!
Bestie! u shudn't have told me you READ my blog, because u confessed u read my blog, i quickly went back to my blog and see if i type-d anything dumb. hahahaha! and i did. shit the last blog.. omgosh, u are reading what i'm THINKING about u.. *ARGH!* fails.
Now i will be un-intentionally be very cautious with what i write d, and thus it will affect what i want to say eventually. GAH! i shall try to be as original, but i actually have a very emo-topic to begin with. Well not actually EMO but, something personal, slightly more personal than personal. wth.
LOL.
Last night, someone i never expected, or at least didn't thought that He would, he suddenly text me, and we chat for at least a good 1hour. and its weird, weird cause, I never have gotten so much of his attention/time spent for just chatting before.. weird cause, i feel funny in a way of the things we shared and b4 we bid goodbye, i know. something is not right already.
But well, since maybe it is just His randomness, but it meant something to me at least.
And its weird that i'm still thinking of the question he asked me which i replied very honestly but as i was trying to rationalize it, that's BAD. cause i know its not RIGHT regardless.
As it touches personal stories, i will re-word a little the Questions he asked me.
Can you be in love with 2 persons at the same time - no, not for lust, but really interested in a few people at the same time cause they give you that special feeling, and you don't want to lose them. You want them all, at the same time cause you can't decide who to let go cause they mean so much to you in different ways..
I was puzzled, cause Love is always for me, just for One.. really just ONE.
Do you have that Love feelings for several persons at a time.. i confidently said NO.
Do you still think about the people you once Loved, or once had your heart eyed on?
I paused, and i quickly detour my answer but truth is i can't deny but yes, i do and i realize i'm still thinking of a few people in my life, but does that mean i still Love them??? NO.
But what strikes me is, when he said, "these feelings don't just go away, it will always be there so why suffer? why can't u just be honest to these inner feelings but brush it away cause love is just for one, i mean if there's one, then let it be but if its 2 then its 2, gotta just accept it.."
I know i care for a few persons in my life very differently but very much, and some i have to ignore cause i know its not someone i want to bring back to my life or trouble myself with but, i can't deny, that i still miss this one person, miss not because of Love, miss because he meant something and i always wonder if he's happy now.
see. destructive! grrrrr!
Well, anyway.
I just hope this randomness of his, don't come too often, just DON'T.
In everyone's heart, there'll always be a lot feelings that confuses you of what's Right.. and i'm one of them, i just hope, this feeling. will go away. I know its not Right, and so i shall not think about it, since blogging is my way of expressing it out, i felt so much better now in a way.
Happy Fwaiday!
I need to have a jolly-relax,full DAY.
HUGGGS!
Love,
Lil3pees :)
No comments:
Post a Comment